File :1216013806.jpg-(23 KB, 365x274, bymygame.jpg)
23 KB Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:36 No.17623162  
Ok guys, I have to confess. I fucked up bad. So there I am, sitting on my couch, starting to fap to nothing really. I've had 4 beers prior, yet I don't know if it directly relates to my incident. But anyway, I start having some kind of fantasy where Jade Redmond and I are both naked in her room. Now I have fucked up fantasies, and I don't ask me how I thought up Jade with this. So in my fantasy, she gets up and tells me to follow her to her closet. We get to the closet and she picks out a bunch of clothes and sets them on her bed. She then forces me to put the clothes on, I'm like, "wut", but I do so as if I don't have any will. I have some weird ass fetishes. So it feels awkward, wearing Jade's clothes and she makes me put on her panties first, and then one of her bras, and gives me some magical fake tits. Then she gives me a long brown skirt and brown shirt. Then she makes me wear these fucking high heels. This entire time, I'm like, "what the fuck?" So then she gives me some wig to make my hair out to look just like hers. And then some weird makeup, I kept masturbating harder and harder. Then she whips out her dick, and then I'm really like, "WHAT THE FUCK?" and forces me to suck on it. She makes me suck on it harder and harder, the whole time yelling, "I BOUGHT YOUR GAME JADE, I BOUGHT YOUR GAME!". I then proceeded to explode(IRL) all over like the fist of god. Then I had the same fantasy 2 hours later for some reason, same thing happened.

What the fuck did you do Jade? YOU FUCKING BRAINWASHED ME JADE.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:38 No.17623241
I lol'd
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:38 No.17623243
Oh god what the fuck?
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:39 No.17623255
Assassin's Creed turns men into homosexuals!

What a scoop, better forward this to kataku.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:39 No.17623280
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:39 No.17623283
I made my cousin lick my butthole once and I thought it'd be funny if he tasted my poo so I tried to shit a little while his tongue was on the hole and I didn't know I had diarreah so it violently squirted all over his face and he told my mom and she beat me
>> ACE 2492 - 5576 - 0792 07/14/08(Mon)01:39 No.17623300
I stopped reading at "Jade Redmond"
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:40 No.17623303

I'm not a homo, it's just jade, it couldn't do anything. (I did buy her game btw.)
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:40 No.17623326
     File :1216014036.jpg-(106 KB, 550x707, jade.jpg)
106 KB
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:40 No.17623331
cool story bro
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:41 No.17623377
>> MAN OF THE YEAR 07/14/08(Mon)01:42 No.17623399

Why the fuck did I read this all the way through? I must be gay
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:42 No.17623411
I'm gonna... wow...
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:43 No.17623457
Damn you Jade, I knew you wanted us to buy your game so you could buy hour games, you shemale whore.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:44 No.17623485
>weird ass fetishes

can you elaborate?
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:46 No.17623546

I don't know, I usually have fanatasies about famous women humiliating me, but nothing like this, this was just fucking bizarre.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:46 No.17623563
roasting in epic bed
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:47 No.17623627
Somehow, I doubt this is copy pasta.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:48 No.17623671
cool story bro
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:49 No.17623707
somebody plz archive this. 11/10 for orginality
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:49 No.17623710

I wonder what Jade would do if she ever saw that comic.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:50 No.17623773
isn't she half chinese or something
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:51 No.17623784
     File :1216014673.jpg-(4 KB, 90x128, 1212111449932.jpg)
4 KB
this thread
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:51 No.17623794
Jade on Jade action, that would be nice. But wouldn't I have to buy 2 copies of Assassin's Creed? Well, at least I have a christmas present for my little brother.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:51 No.17623811
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:52 No.17623840
How do you suck and yell?
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:53 No.17623885

I was sucking on her, and she was yelling, I looked like her, I guess.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:54 No.17623928
This is tame by /d/ standards.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:54 No.17623936
     File :1216014899.gif-(21 KB, 320x240, 1210042197610.gif)
21 KB
OP that was prolly an elaborate lie, but i love you man
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:55 No.17623938
You stop for a second, yell, and start again.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:56 No.17623978

i fucking lol'd and I don't know why
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:56 No.17623990
I'm probably going to do this again, maybe even tonight, but atleast now that I'm sober I can make it so she's the one sucking and I'm the one who's yelling the game.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:57 No.17624034

I fucking wish this was an elaborate lie, Jade Redmond scared me for life.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:57 No.17624048
i would seriously do anything jade told me to if i just got to touch her body. fuck im seriously in love with her and its pathetic.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:58 No.17624085

Even if you had to suck on her 8 inch dick?
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)01:59 No.17624124
In a heartbeat. dickgirls are hot.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:01 No.17624181
Its Raymond
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:02 No.17624238
feels good man
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:04 No.17624301
Make this a Jade image thread to enhance the fantasy.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:05 No.17624356
File deleted.

>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:08 No.17624466
     File :1216015729.jpg-(229 KB, 480x720, Jade4.jpg)
229 KB
look at that white coat who is she trying to fool? is she trying to be a scientist or something?
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:11 No.17624565
Somebody has to draw Jade with a cock, the shock value would be immense.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:13 No.17624640

for fuck sake, /b/.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:13 No.17624651
Anyone got a pic of jades feet?
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:14 No.17624679
     File :1216016061.png-(36 KB, 129x141, feelsgoodman.png)
36 KB
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:14 No.17624701
I never got the foot fetish.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:15 No.17624719
Now I'm going to fap to the same thing...
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:16 No.17624775

>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:17 No.17624816
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:18 No.17624845
Foot fetishes are among the worst. Real feet are fucking disgusting, smelly, full of flaws, and look especially disgusting if the feet in question aren't properly managed.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:19 No.17624929

What about cute feet slathered with sweet, soft lotion?
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:21 No.17625015

>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:22 No.17625035
     File :1216016554.jpg-(21 KB, 476x360, n514430969_63787_2196.jpg)
21 KB
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:26 No.17625177

What is up with her obsession of wearing white and bright? Does she think she's and angel or something?
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:27 No.17625248
She IS an angel.
Of beauty and kindness.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:28 No.17625270

I wouldn't actually mind sucking on an angel's penis, given that the angel was jade.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:28 No.17625281

i see what you did there.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:28 No.17625288
She's really cute, and she's done a lot of credible work in the game industry. This you cannot deny.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:31 No.17625397

lol'd 5/10
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:34 No.17625525
Archive please this shit.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:38 No.17625681
Wow, this shit has already been copy pasta'd on /r9k/.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:41 No.17625789
     File :1216017699.png-(9 KB, 256x223, TRNG.png)
9 KB
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:44 No.17625925

Jade was the producer, thus is why she would go suck cock to get more people to buy her game.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:46 No.17626005
     File :1216018006.jpg-(18 KB, 240x180, 1195978209856.jpg)
18 KB
Christ I lol'd
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:47 No.17626047

I hate myself for it.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:48 No.17626070
This, totally.
THere's nothing better than a great trap. I only wish Hermaprodites actually existed so I could have without beint completely gay, since real dickgirls are just men with tit injections.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:52 No.17626227
I want some art of Jade Redmond and her cock, and I want it now
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:53 No.17626271
/v/ banned the drawfags remember?
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:53 No.17626273

>since real dickgirls are just men with tit injections.

No, hardcore, crossdressing, short haircut bearing, lesbians are just men with tit injections. Dick girls are just super sexy human beings with curves and skin that go on forever. They just happen to have a dick, which adds to the erotic nature of your weird fetish for them.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:53 No.17626279
I hate myself for lol'ing.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:55 No.17626376

So then I'm not completely gay?

>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:57 No.17626442
     File :1216018658.jpg-(16 KB, 276x400, ShouldNotWant.jpg)
16 KB
>Then she whips out her dick, and then I'm really like, "WHAT THE FUCK?" and forces me to suck on it. She makes me suck on it harder and harder
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:58 No.17626473

No, you're not. Her dick turns you on for some reason, but the fact that she's still a woman on the outside in every way possible still makes her a woman. You'd suck her off because she's a woman. Why else would you do anything for a woman?
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)02:58 No.17626485
She's not even that good looking, goddamn this shit ruining my vidya industry.
>> Anonymous 07/14/08(Mon)03:01 No.17626576

she doesn't even look like she's wearing a bra.