File : 1247361690.jpg-(218 KB, 1024x413, engagement.jpg)
218 KB Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)21:21 No.5137363  
My forces were forced into an engagement I wasn't prepared for. Their cavalry had smashed into a flank while we were unprepared, before quickly withdrawing, forcing us to take time out to gather our wits and reform our forces. It was a disaster, in that time their archers got close enough to release volleys of crossbow bolts into our disarrayed ranks, which only further demolished our moral. When their infantry hit it looked like we had no hope, but still my brave soldiers fought on. The battle raged for near half an hour as men uncounted died, not for king and country, but for the hope of a warm bed and food in their bellies.

I had led this men here. I had been the one who dragged them from their pitiful - but safe - homes and into this warzone with promises of riches and glory. Now they were dying by the score every minute, their death screams echoing in my ears. I needed to think, how could I save them? To the south lay water, we could not cross that, but at least that flank was protected. The east had been the direction our foe had advanced from. To the north was a swamp, it was possible but dangerous to withdraw in that direction.
>> Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)21:22 No.5137370
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I considered West, but before I could give the order I noticed them...

Reinforcements. Our treacherous foe had brought up reinforcements! We were trapped in a pincer, a pincer made of steel and death. I could see the light gleaming off their armor and knew in my heart they were heavy cavalry. They would charge into our rear and decimate our forces in an instant, shattering our will to fight and leaving us easy pickings.

That meant I had only one choice. I was now regretting I had ever undertaken this campaign, but I had made this bed and now I must lay in it. There was only one option, head north to try and escape the trap, or die between the hammer and the anvil.
>> Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)21:23 No.5137375
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So I picked up the dice and threw 2 sixes.
>> Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)21:26 No.5137390
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>>5137375
Does he have an "H" on his forehead?
>> Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)21:26 No.5137391
     File1247362010.jpg-(11 KB, 471x348, picked up the dice again.jpg)
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The other guy couldn't believe it. My go again! Another 2 sixes!
>> Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)21:31 No.5137413
>>5137391
lol
>> Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)21:32 No.5137419
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Then disaster.
I picked up the dice and threw a 2 and a 3.
But then the other player picked up the dice and threw snake eyes. I was still in it!
>> Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)21:34 No.5137429
>>5137390
clearly you have never seen Red Dwarf. I pity your sad, sad existence
>> Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)21:38 No.5137443
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Any-way, to cut a long story short, I threw a 5 and a 4 which beat his 3 and a 2, ANOTHER double 6 followed by a double 4 and a double 5, and after he threw a 3 and a 2, I threw a 6 and a 3!
>> Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)21:39 No.5137449
>>5137429
oh, spin my nipple-nuts and send me to alaska!
>> Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)21:45 No.5137475
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Non gamer: Can't you tell this story is not. Gripping. Me. I am in a complete state of ungrippedness. I am completely smegging ungripped. Shut the smeg up!
>> Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)21:48 No.5137493
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I'd assumed that was because I hadn't gotten to the really interesting bit.
>> Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)21:50 No.5137504
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Non gamer: Ok. Ok. What is the interesting bit?
>> Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)21:51 No.5137515
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I threw a 5 and a 2.
>> Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)22:15 No.5137674
>>5137475
>>5137493
>>5137504
>>5137515
Screenshoting this for the next time someone tells a really, really boring story.
>> Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)22:17 No.5137679
This is pretty fucking awesome.
>> Anonymous 07/11/09(Sat)22:22 No.5137707
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7yf4A0dGyAE